Burned by the Backburner

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Ladies. Another year is upon us.

Whether you are returning to school or starting up your stellar career, we wish you a rock’in, non-drama year.

Of course, with the new year starting, we thought we’d share one piece of humble advice.

AVOID THE BACKBURNER!

The Backburner: an umbrella term used to define relationship status.

You know how stoves have around 4 burners? And you always use the front ones but rarely the back ones? Well, in dating let’s just say you never want to be on the backburner.

The backburner can be incredibly useful or infuriating.

Scenario #1

You like a boy. He wears J. Crew button-ups and has really white teeth. But dang it you just aren’t feel’in it. WHY CAN’T YOU MAKE YOURSELF LIKE HIM?!? Dang. But maybe you just need to give it time. You’ll start to like him eventually…maybe. There are some other fellas who are slightly more flirty and you want to see where things will go with them. So what do you do?

You put him on the backburner.

How to put someone on the back burner

1)    Don’t say yes to every date. Maybe every other time.

2)    Respond to texts…an hour later.

3)    Go hang out but don’t commit to long term things like backpacking trips.

4)    Cuddle but don’t let them kiss you.

Be careful to not let the Backburner become the Fade Out.

Backburner=good and to your advantage. Keeps lots of fish on the line.

Fade Out=bad and gives you a sketchy reputation.

Scenario #2

You like a boy. He’s taken you out maybe twice and is showing a lot of interest. But he’s more complicated than a girl when it comes to figuring out what he wants. He doesn’t see you every weekend night so it’s safe to assume he’s taking out other girls. WHAT. THE. HECK. He’ll shoot you a text a couple times a week and always reminds you that he still needs to make you his famous chicken curry. Oooh he is like a slippery fish. What does he want?!?

How to stay off of the back burner

1)    Be proactive. If he flirts with you and keeps reminding you how you need to finish the summer bucket list you started together, make him give you a day he wants to do it. Say, “How about Saturday?” BOOM. Call him out.

2)    Don’t always be available. Nothing whisks you onto the front burner like competition.

3)    Confidence. Don’t let him think you are a wilting flower waiting for him to water you. Show him he needs you.

Avoid being put on the backburner at all costs. Unless you want to put him on the backburner as well and then you conveniently are each other’s “Plan B”, or as we like to say, your “Ramen Noodle dinner”.

Remember, you need to learn how to play the game better than they do.

Running out of burners,

Gert and Char